Headdesk, June, headdesk.

June, June, June...let's talk.

I'm sensing a little animosity, June. Or, maybe, it's simply an overflow from May. Yeees, that's it. This is overflow. And now that it's all out of our system, you're going to be a little sunnier, a little happier, a little tamer. Surely. Right?

I mean, maybe there was a misunderstanding. Maybe when I said "play nice" I can assure you, sweet June, that I did not mean any of this. This is not good for my health.

Let me recap, June. Just to lay my end on the table.

Good morning June! Lalala! Lovely day at...hey? What's this note? Our computers aren't cooperating? Hm. Must've been a power surge. I'll just reboot. Lalala.

Hm. They're still not working. Bizarre. I guess I'll call tech support. Again. Oh well. Lalala.

Wait...why is the main computer is completely down? This means all the computers are down, y'know. Sigh.

You're not sure what's wrong? This is bad. And you think the router was fried. Okay.

And it wasn't hooked up properly by The Company in the first place? Great.

It's still not working, The Company. Why is it not working? Not the router.

Not the router. This is bad.

Not the router.

Sure, I'll hold. I've only been on hold, on the phone or waiting for you to return my call for six to seven hours now. Sure.

Wait...what do you mean it's the motherboard?

Sure, you can send a tech out tomorrow. Sure we can wait to input all these tickets. From all these funerals. Sure.

...what do you MEAN you installed the wrong motherboard? That there are three different types and that they didn't know this one was for a flower shop? Even though a floral representative was on the line with us and the tech and I had an entire conversation about how our shop was a hilarious name for a florist?
...
Sure, I'll hold. Sure.

YOU USED THE WRONG ADDRESS?! WHAT DO YOU MEAN "SOMEHOW STOP THE UPS TRUCK?!"
Oh. You didn't use the wrong address. You just thought you did. Ha.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN "I ONLY HAVE TWO TICKETS?" YOU SHOULD HAVE THREE. THREE COMPUTERS.
Oh. You actually have all three. Now you see it. The service tags are one digit apart. Hilarious.

No real instructions with the new credit card terminal? Awesome.

AAAAAH! WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEY NEVER INSTALLED THE WRONG MOTHERBOARD IN THE FIRST PLACE AND THEY LIED TO US?! AHHH! AHHH! AHHH! THAT THEY NEVER KNEW WHAT WAS GOING ON THE WHOLE TIME?! AHHH! AHHH! AHHH!


Ahem. I digress. June, I mean, we are only three days in. And, cautiously, it looks as if the computers are fixed now. Tenatively. Hopefully. Crossing fingersy.

So I'm still leaving the coffee, tea and brownies on the table for now. But I'm warning you, no cheap tricks. (okay, really, I'll cave, just don't hurt me.)